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| Ben Whitlock ('15) |
All in a Day, Part II
The boy was low when he left Mr. Mitchell’s home. In fact, he was below low . . . he felt ignorant. . . He was convinced that he knew nothing! It was a hard pill to swallow, but his emptiness inside only intensified when he thought of all the things he would have to learn – the books he would have to read, the lectures he would have to attend, the tests he would have to take. How could he possibly get ahead? How could he plan his future well enough to be successful? He was so low and miserable, in fact, that he felt he could no longer hold in his anxieties. He stomach knotted, a lump came to his throat, and tears welled in his eyes. He was going nowhere! “There’s no plan!” he thought. “What am I going to do about the future? Where am I going to go? . . . I certainly can’t go home like this!”
At that time, Dear Reader, our young friend sat on a stone and did the thing we all must do, at times: he felt sorry for himself and cried.
Then, as he wept, he realized another sensation in his stomach. A low growl rang in his ears and shook his belly. He was hungry! “Now I know there’s no plan!” the boy cried aloud. “Dad didn’t even pack me a lunch! Now what??!??” . . . A voice called from behind him suddenly. He turned to see three young women in beautifully bright outfits and hats. Their smiles illuminated everything. The women rode tandem bicycles – two on a speedy red bike and one at the front of a sleek black one.
“We’re on our way to town,” said one. “We’d be glad if you came to eat with us. You look a little hungry.”
“I am hungry,” said the boy. “I haven’t eaten since breakfast.”
“You can ride with me,” said the woman on the black bike. “We enjoy company, and you look like you’ve had a rough morning.”
“I had a great morning,” replied the boy. “My mother gave me everything I needed this morning. I had a delicious breakfast very early and was instructed to do my early morning chores. After my chores, my father sent me on a task – he said he had the whole day planned for me, but I don’t think that’s true. I don’t know what to do next. I just want to go home.” The boy was ashamed to feel the tears well up again. His flush face was a sure give-away, he thought. However, one of the ladies extended a hand to invite the troubled fellow to come with them. He accepted.
The boy climbed on the black bike and rode with the three women to town, where he would dine with them at a small café. As they rode, the same light carefree breeze hit him soothingly in his face to dry his tears. He noticed that the perfume of the lady in front of him wafted around him and reminded him of his mother – fresh linen, flowers, and happiness. He smiled at the way the women laughed and talked to him and to each other. His anxieties waned a little, then. The worries and struggles left his mind as they left the place of his despair – and he let them subside, if only for a moment.
At the café, the four friends sat at an outdoor table under the shade of an umbrella. The boy learned the names of his companions: Calliope, Thalia, and Sappho. (What funny names.) Calliope apparently loved to read. She quoted poetry often and was constantly smiling her shy smile. Thalia joked good-naturedly at every turn of the conversation. And Sappho was young and immensely pretty – she was very intelligent and made the boy happy to ask himself hard questions. They ordered sweet tea with lemonade mixed in and simple sandwiches. The food filled the boy, certainly, but the conversation and laughter filled him more completely. . . The food filled his body, but his friends filled his heart. The enjoyment felt at sharing a meal and talking with one another bonded the four people together, and the boy departed feeling once again capable of fulfilling his father’s wishes. He knew there were hard questions to be asked and he knew that he had so much to learn, but he learned that he must happily continue through his day.
(To Be Continued . . . )
The Real World Example
Family meals offer numerous benefits to our families, including but not limited to the fact that they:
• Provide a source of identity. On the macro level, traditional family meals can teach children where their family came from or give them insights into their cultural or religious history. . . On a more micro level, they can serve as reminders of events that have shaped your family and your children.
• Strengthens the family bond. Researchers have consistently found that families that engage in frequent family meals report stronger connection and unity than families that do not. Family meals provide an all-too-rare chance for face-to-face interaction
• Offer comfort and security. Family meals are the often the antidote to the harried feeling that comes from our fast-paced and ever-changing world.
• Provides an opportunity to teach values. One of the main purposes of rituals, whether religious or secular, is to impart and reinforce values. The same goes for family meals.
• Add to the rhythm and seasonality of life. Our world and universe are composed of cycles big and small – sunrise and sunset, death and rebirth, winter, spring, summer, and fall. Even the generations move in cycles. A circular conception of time and a desire to follow the natural rhythm of the days and the seasons is embedded deep within us, but has been flattened out in a modern age that creates its own timetable and concentrates only on the present.
• Create lasting memories. Recent research has shown that reflecting fondly on one’s past actually provides a myriad of positive benefits including counteracting loneliness, boosting generosity towards strangers, and staving off anxiety.
The importance of sharing meals does not apply to families alone, however. Each of these reasons can be applied to friends and acquaintances. Eating together as friends creates a group identity; food strengthens the bonds between people; it offers comfort and security (comfort food, anyone?); it allows people to share values across regional or cultural lines; food contributes to the rhythm and seasonality of life; and sharing meals creates memories that last a lifetime.
Often, I have thought about the importance of food. It is very interesting how food brings people together. Take, for example, two vastly different people – one, the CEO of a Fortune 500 company; the other, a mechanic who owns his own shop. On the surface, these two have nothing in common – their worries are different, their lives are different, they drive different cars, one vacations at his summer home for months while the other is lucky to have a week in Tennessee. . . However, set these two men down for a beer together or a steak (or both) – in other words, give them a reason to sit down together – and they’ll realize that they are not so different. Both men own their own business, they worry about production, both may love classic Chrysler sedans, and both struggle to truly relax. (This song does a good job of setting the mood for this scene: http://www.grooveshark.com/#!/s/People+Are+Crazy/5aDLdV?src=5 )
Food acts as a bonding agent among people.
Food fills the body. Friends fill the heart.
Perhaps the philosopher, Epicurus, said it best when he said: “We should look for someone to eat and drink with before looking for something to eat and drink.”
Ben Whitlock is a junior McConnell Scholar from Greensburg, KY. Whitlock is studying political science and history.