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By Emilia Perez
I have the pleasure of having a family from two cultures. My father’s side is from Mexico and all speak Spanish, and my mother’s side is American and speak English and Spanish. I’m lucky to have my grandmother, or Abuelita Celia, in my life, and she visits us often. The most recent time she was here, I sat down to interview her about the town she grew up in many years ago. Here are the fascinating details she shared with me, translated into English.
Where did you live growing up?
I grew up in the town of San Marcos, in the state of Tula de Allende Hidalgo. My parents lived there their whole lives but my mother, Emilia, was born in Polotitlan and my father, Froylan, was born in San Marcos. I was one of 14 siblings. Your great grandfather built a house in San Marcos out of cement, and he made the blocks with his own hands out of cement and sand. It had one kitchen, one corridor, and three bedrooms, but we didn’t all have to fit in there at the same time because the older ones grew up and moved out to go to school. We had some other homes because my father worked at the cement factory, but I was very little. Today, my siblings live on the land that my father gifted us and have built large homes there. All that land that your aunts and uncles live on used to be owned by Abuelito Froylan.
Tell me about your mother, whom I was named after.
My mother was Maria Emilia Almaraz Cruz. I looked just like her. My other siblings looked like her but I did the most and they still tell me that. She was married when she was about 13 or 14 and had many children, but that’s how they did it at the time and I don’t know why. Don’t do that! Girls must enjoy their youth and their studies and progress on their own. She didn’t really have a career, she kept the house and took care of the children, but she had her own business and sold food. She sold tortas, drinks, snacks, and she sold them next to the cement factory and would feed the workers who came out for lunch or dinner.
She always bathed in the river, and would also take corn to the mill by the river to grind it to flour. One early morning she went to the mill and saw a person’s body on the side of the river, and she thinks someone killed him. I asked her “Oh mami, weren’t you scared?” and she said “No why? He’s dead and can't hurt me!” She was more afraid of people that were alive than those who weren’t.
I always wore dresses growing up because your Abuelita didn’t like for us to wear pants. She said those were only for men. She made the dresses and they were very pretty, and they were always decent and went past the knee never above the knee. They were stiff and crinoline.
How did you feel learning that your son, my dad, would marry an American?
Oh it wasn’t that radical. Your cousin’s wife is from Paraguay, and I knew people who married from many other LatinAmerican countries. The important thing was that they loved each other, and they still do.
My mom’s dad is American, but because he was my best friend as a child who spoke Spanish, he’s also my Abuelito, the Spanish word for grandfather. I interviewed him about his experience learning Spanish, coming from an entirely English-speaking family and background.
How did you learn spanish?
With a book, and verbally. I studied it in high school, and I even asked my church seminary teacher to teach in Spanish but he preferred English. I loved it, and when I went to Argentina serving a church mission, I had a fun time taking Spanish lessons. But when I went to practice with Argentinians, it was a different story. I told my mission president, “I don't understand them! I ask them things and they understand me and they respond, but I don’t know what they’re saying!” And he said to just give it some time. One day I was biking with my mission companion and we were on our way back from picking up suits from the dry cleaners when his suit fell off. A man waved me down and said, “Your friend’s suit fell off the bike!” And all of a sudden I could understand him! I thought that was just too cool.
How did you feel when you learned you’d go to Argentina and speak Spanish?
I was thrilled! I thought I knew what I was doing too. I thought I’d show off and spoke to this little boy at the airport and asked him, “Cómo te llamas (What’s your name)?” and he said “Como? (What)?” “¿Cómo te llamas?” “Como?” “¿Cuántos años tienes (How old are you)?” “Como?” Maybe he was Venezuelan, but I’d shown off the fact that I couldn’t speak Spanish as well as I thought I could. That humbled me, but when I became more fluent I started dreaming in Spanish!
How did you feel when you found out that your daughter was going to marry a Mexican?
I thought, “Okay we’re having Spanish coming here!” She also learned Spanish on a mission, and I figured she knew it better than I, and I’d ask her how to say certain things. We asked her to bring him to Indiana so we could meet him, and my what a fine fellow. We’ve always loved your dad and your parents are just precious. I always tell your Grandma, “We couldn’t have asked for a better son-in-law. They just make the best couple.”
How did you like speaking Spanish with your grandkids?
Oh, I loved it. We had so much fun when you all would come over, and the grandkids who didn’t speak Spanish I’d tell them some things and translate for them and teach them a little, and we’d switch from Spanish to English depending if your Grandma was there. It’s so interesting to see little bitty ones, because they start with one, then two, then a hundred words. A child starts with nothing, no language, and all of a sudden they speak both so well.
I’m so privileged to share two cultures and two languages with two families. I recently wrote a poem for my Heritage Learners Spanish course, and based it off of the experiences I’ve had. I’ve included the original version, which rhymes, and the translated English version.
Hay dos lados de mi cultura,
Uno de aquí y uno de allá.
Mis raices son como una mixtura
Y son difíciles de separar.
Soy hija de un inmigrante
Quien dejo todo de lo que supo
Lo hizo para su amante
Y criaron una familia juntos
Los Americanos de mi familia también hablan el espanol
Aunque suenan un poco gringo
Saben apreciar la salsa y el frijol.
Cómo es que conocemos el día de los reyes?
Mi padre trajo sus tradiciones, así como el ratón de los dientes.
Con mi ciudadania doble de aquí y de México,
Nunca he soñado en vivir sin todos mis abuelitos
Viajando pa’qui y pa’lla he tenido lo doble del sabor
Doble idioma, doble cultura, y más que doble de amor.
There are two sides to my culture,
One from here and one from there.
My roots are like a mixture
And are difficult to separate.
I’m the daughter of an immigrant
Who left all that he knew
He did it for his lover
And they built a family together
The americans in my family speak Spanish too
Although they sound a little gringo (non-native)
They know to appreciate salsa and beans
How do we know about Three Kings Day?
My dad brought his traditions, like the Mouse of the Teeth
With my double citizenship for the US and Mexico, I’ve never dreamed of living without all my grandparents.
Traveling back and forth, I’ve experienced double the flavor Double language, double culture, and more than double of the love.
Emilia, of Louisville, Ky., is a member of the McConnell Scholar Class of 2027 at the University of Louisville. She plans to study political science on a global studies and international affairs track.