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| Celia Cusick ('20) |
During my travels to China, it became quite clear that many familiar social norms and practices no longer applied. It seemed almost as if our customs and norms had been flipped on their head and were the accepted practice in China, which is to say the differences were very apparent. However, I was thankful because I believe that exposure to cultural differences is one of the most valuable takeaways from traveling. In an increasingly connected world, it is imperative to learn about other cultures for professional purposes, and personal development. You have everything to gain aside from sacrificing familiarity and comfort for a few weeks. While in China, perhaps the most notable distinction was the different conceptions of personal space.
Personal space in the United States is a precious, fiercely defended concept. We teach children from a young age to remain “in their own bubble” and to respect others as well. Minding your own business is a widely accepted social convention. In China, the world’s most populated country, personal space is a commodity not easily found. Of all the differences I noticed during my trip, perhaps the most glaring difference between China and the United States was the amount of people and the how closely packed everything was. People always seemed to be out and about; I never saw a place that wasn’t buzzing with some sort of activity no matter the time of the day. People were close to you at all times. As someone who enjoys their personal space and requires alone time to recharge, this was particularly difficult to get used to. Often, people packed close together to see a tourist site. I observed that for the Chinese personal space seemed to be left by the wayside. After reflection, I now think the Chinese people value closeness. The American conception of personal space was replaced by a closeness and familiarity regardless if the person next you were a stranger or not.
My own ethnocentric views blocked my understanding of this practice. It did not occur to me that the difference in norms might have more to do with than with just the enormity of the population. I realized that I might be wrong when I was asked by one of our student guides, who accompanied the group many places to help us navigate, about how couples interacted in the US. She observed that public displays of affection seemed to be a rare sighting in American culture and asked why couples seemed to be so cold towards one another. After her question, I started to realize that our concepts of personal space might be more layered than I originally thought. Our concepts of space are also a reflection of the individualistic culture of the west versus the collectivist culture of the east. However, I was not convinced that individualism can be equated to detached and cold; we are not colder for demanding the space we occupy and not detached because we so brazenly protect our own bubbles.
Individualism can be a positive force. It lends people the courage to demand that they be treated justly, the platform to voice concerns, and the ability to choose their own path-which in no way disparages collectivism. We have individualism to thank for concepts such as self-care and self-awareness. Though, I do understand where our student guide's impression could come from; do American ideas such as personal space make it difficult to form meaningful relationships with others? In a society that values thinking of yourself and maintaining a healthy distance between people; it seems hard to connect with others. It takes an extra effort to be a part of a community because we are not as close to one another, and the family unit is often much more complicated than just the nuclear model. But despite all these factors, I have witnessed in several instances a strong sense of community. The most difficult part of forming relationships within an individualistic society is that the individual is responsible for seeking these other relationships out and are not as ingrained in our cultural norms.
Although, American’s enjoy personal space and privacy, I do not believe that the majority of them would like to be left alone. In fact, I think it’s quite the opposite. I think Americans, though we express closeness in a much different way, actively seek out opportunities to share their lives, opinions, and stories with others. The effort to find a sense of community has broadened the American view of what can be defined as a community and expanded the places it can be found. It may take the extra effort of being open and receptive to others, but then it’s often reciprocated. However, individualism could stand to take a page from collectivism’s book because to create meaningful connections with others you must see beyond your own interests and goals and be receptive to others, something I think American’s -myself included- could stand to work on in their lives.
Though I doubt I will be willing to sacrifice any of my personal space and privacy soon, I took a valuable lesson away from my time in China: being close to others is an important part of being a member of the international community and this requires an open mind and meeting others with respect and compassion. Community is important, but it doesn’t require you to relinquish your own identity as an individual- in fact it often encourages you to be a more genuine version of yourself.
Celia Cusick, of Elizabethtown, Ky., is a member of the McConnell Scholar Class of 2020. She studies political science and psychology at the University of Louisville.