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This semester I decided to take American Sign Language as my foreign language requirement because I thought it would be a unique language to study. Through learning ASL, I would also have the opportunity to learn about the significance of Deaf culture, which I had not been exposed to before. I did not think learning ASL would be easy by any means, but I was surprised at the level of discomfort I have experienced attempting to fully grasp the language. In my initial understanding of ASL, I thought it was just communication with your hands, which I soon found out was not the case. ASL mostly relies on facial expression rather than hand movement. While hand movements are important, a sign can be confusing or completely wrong if the signer does not use the correct facial expression. This added element adds to the beauty of the language but has been slightly uncomfortable to navigate and learn.
As a part of our curriculum requirements, we must attend a designated number of hours of deaf community events. The first and most recent Deaf community event I attended was the Deaf Awareness Panel. Through this experience at my first Deaf community event, my eyes were opened to the challenges that deaf people face when communicating in predominantly hearing spaces. Prior to the start of the event, everyone was conversing in ASL. Since this is my first semester learning the language there was little I understood, and I struggled to communicate back with others. I sat there in awkwardness as those around me were immersed in conversation, while I had mostly no idea what was being said. The actual event panel had an interpreter present that spoke English out loud, but this feeling of discomfort stuck with me. Not because this was something I could not handle nor was it a horrible experience, but it shed light on how I never paid attention to the negative experiences that deaf people face having to interact with the hearing world. With the semblance of isolation, I felt through this 2-hour experience it was clear that I had failed to consider the isolation deaf people could feel on a day to day. I can only imagine how it must truly feel to live in a world only designed for hearing people and then being forced to adapt. In each of our own identities, we feel safer within our communities, and I truly realized how the deaf community can be a haven for deaf people when most people are not trying to communicate with and understand them.
I found this experience to be a call to action to myself to take my American Sign Language education seriously and be grateful for what knowing the language could afford me. I know I am not an expert and there is much to learn, but ASL gives me the opportunity to see the people within the Deaf community more vividly. I can also take this experience as an accountability check and the importance of using my place of privilege as a hearing person to help create visibility for deaf individuals that experience their identity not being a societal norm. My few experiences of discomfort in learning ASL pale in comparison to the struggles that deaf people face trying to assimilate into the hearing world while also holding on to their Deaf identity. There is still an immense amount for me to learn of the language and the importance of Deaf culture. Hopefully each step I take in embracing the feelings of discomfort in learning ASL it will make engaging in the language easier and I can better evaluate my privilege. Through this I hope to help spread awareness and be a better ally for those within the deaf community.
Paighton Brooks is a McConnell Scholar in the class of 2023. She is studying political science at the University of Louisville.