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| Erica Gaither Class of 2019 |
In high school, I was the definition of an overachiever.
I’ll admit it- I was “that” girl. You know, the one who was president of this
club, secretary of that one, volunteered here, joined that, worked there, kept
all A’s, knew all the teachers, had a life plan put together since the age of
11. Yeah, “that” girl. Thinking back to my high school experience, I can’t help
but cringe at how many things I did because I thought it would “look good” on a
college application. I had made a slight promise to myself that in college I
would try- key word “try”- to start saying no to things.
I really hate to admit that this mentality lasted maybe an
hour, or so, on the first day I moved in. Being in the honors dorm, I am
surrounded 24 hours a day by people just like me. They were number one of their
class, they were in that club too, they went to GSP too, they worked somewhere
too, they volunteered there too. It’s overwhelming to say the least. The fear
that maybe you aren’t as smart as you thought. That feeling of “Oh my gosh, how
did I get into this”? When you meet people who made a 36 on the ACT, started
their own organization, and helped run a political campaign- it’s hard to not
to want to run out and join everything you can to get a competitive edge. It’s
been engrained in every decision I make to do it for my resume.
It’s been one of the hardest lessons for me to grasp, but over
the course of these 9 months I have realized that I AM good enough. Nothing
good can come about of me comparing myself to others, because my timeline and
interests are different. I don’t have to run for president of every RSO, apply
for an on- campus position, be the chair of five different organizations all at
the same time just because it could possibly give me connections and reflect just
how well of a leader I can be. It’s a disservice not only to myself, but to any
organization that I join and am not committed too whole- heartedly. I want to
spend my time volunteering at Americana and working with refugee-youth, I want
to go to conferences about racial injustices in our country, I want to have
time to sit down in the library and actually do my homework, I want to explore
this beautiful city with my friends every free moment that I have. If I find an
organization that focuses on an issue I feel strongly toward, then of course I
will want to take a chance and see if I can make an impact in a larger
capacity. But until that time comes, I won’t be the one to join twenty organizations
for the hopes of having a three page resume and coming of as “well-rounded”. If
that makes me an underachiever in some eyes, then oh well. I am only 19-years-old
once. Then I’ll be 20, then 21 and before I know it, I’m graduating. I refuse
to look back on my collegiate career and have wasted one moment doing something
I wasn’t interested in just for the sake of an appearance.
It’s incredible and completely terrifying to understand that
my freshman year of college is nearly over. As I sit in the floor of one of my
best friend’s room, surrounded by four more of our closest friends, trying to
write down these thoughts and simultaneously keep up with our ever-evolving
conversation, I can’t help but smile. I’m happy- truly happy. And I’m doing everything
I can to keep it this way.
Erica Gaither is a freshman McConnell Scholar at the University of Louisville studying political science.